I recently saw the movie Benny and Joon. My favorite line in the whole movie was "when it comes down to it, raisins are just humiliated grapes."
I couldn't agree more. I despise raisins. They ruin everything! Cookies, cakes, I've even seen them in main dishes (horrifying, I tell you). Several weeks ago, I purchased some trail mix at Costco. To my dismay, there were three times as many raisins as there were M&Ms. Which means I had to do a lot of digging to find an adequate amount of chocolate to go with my almonds (which I ate first), peanuts, and cashews. I can't say I'm entirely surprised-- trail mix companies are renown for getting the proportions of chocolate and raisins wrong. When confronted about this, they usually mumble something about raisins being healthy. But really-- can something that from far away looks like a shriveled dead fly possibly be healthy? I think not.
The only "humiliated grapes" I like are the ones from California that sing and dance. (They do a particularly funny rendition of "Rudolf the Rednose Reindeer" which can be found on youtube). Who can resist food that possesses unusual talent? I like Veggie Tales for the same reason.
Nevertheless, I can think of only one time where I would actually contemplate eating a raisin. Let's briefly consider what happened to the Donner-Reed party. If I had been there, I'm fairly certain I would have preferred those little boxes of Sun Maid raisins to munching on my family and friends.
But then again, I may have just chosen to starve.